Week Three: Let's Commit to Colorblindness
Hopefully you read my Blog Week 1 and 2 if not go back to start there! We are continuing our discussion on getting our thinking straight so we can stop feeling depressed, stuck and weighted down by low self esteem. In this blog we’re going to talk more about cognitive distortions—the ways we get our thinking all mucked up. Specifically in today’s post we’re going to talk about “Black and White thinking” and how to fix it.
Black and white thinking is one of the most common cognitive hangups we have. It essentially tells us that we can only like or be satisfied with object A at the exlusion of any thought given to object B. Without getting very complex into the naming of this cognitive shortcut, it has its roots in our understanding of race relations or lack there of. It argues that our brains take the most efficient routes to arrive at a decision in the shortest possible time with the least amount of resources. Essentially what this does it it freezes us into rigid preferences for and against something.From a survival standpoint the quick ability to make a rapid decision when faced with two competing situations, objects, or people, offered our ancestors a survival edge--hence we still do it. However, as threats to our wellbeing such as eating a poisoned mushroom, encountering a wiled animal etc are far different from our ancestors this holdover gets us into trouble constantly.
So when we are looking to deprogram this program in our brain we first need to see how it manifests in our day-to-day lives. I know for me when I become depressed I immediately start to think in all dark terms. I might say I'm not capable enough to make the situation work. Someone on the opposite spectrum may actually overrate their worth. In both cases we're not seeing the situation as it is. The key to moving past black and white thinking is to begin to question our assessment and start challenging ourselves with the question "what are all my options". It can be hard to do this when we are either too depressed or too happy but pushing through to ask about options is good practice to getting the brain to prune black and white thinking strategies and improve accurate observations of what's happening around you. So lets see.
I am depressed. This statement doesn't allow me to go anywhere with the depression. I have made depression a hard, immutable fact. But if I...
...add I am depressed because I am angry at Doris. We have somewhere to go. I've just given a more specific answer about my depression. Now I can challenge the black and white thinking I have about the situation with Doris.
I am angry at Doris for giving me a dirty look the other day when I went into the cafeteria. Ah-hah--we no have the full exploration of the situation. Now Doris has do do one more thing to illustrate black and white thinking.
It was clear she hates me. Bingo! There it is the black thinking that excludes all other options for Doris's look.
Here is where we now apply healthy cognitive patterns to reshape our ready-to-jump into a negative plane of existence ways of thinking.
So how we do it: write out all the possibilities that led to Doris making a face. Could she have eaten something bitter, could she be having a bad day, could she have just had a fight? And so on. By the time you are done making a list of other explanations for behavior you saw, your brain will slip out of black and white thinking and more into realistic thinking. It's far more likely that Doris was processing internal stimuli over starting at you. We are by nature self-centered meaning we are the only ones thinking so much about our selves.
Your homework: think of a situation where you have used black and white thinking and go through the process of finding other explanations to the stimuli you are upset about.
Black and white thinking is one of the most common cognitive hangups we have. It essentially tells us that we can only like or be satisfied with object A at the exlusion of any thought given to object B. Without getting very complex into the naming of this cognitive shortcut, it has its roots in our understanding of race relations or lack there of. It argues that our brains take the most efficient routes to arrive at a decision in the shortest possible time with the least amount of resources. Essentially what this does it it freezes us into rigid preferences for and against something.From a survival standpoint the quick ability to make a rapid decision when faced with two competing situations, objects, or people, offered our ancestors a survival edge--hence we still do it. However, as threats to our wellbeing such as eating a poisoned mushroom, encountering a wiled animal etc are far different from our ancestors this holdover gets us into trouble constantly.
So when we are looking to deprogram this program in our brain we first need to see how it manifests in our day-to-day lives. I know for me when I become depressed I immediately start to think in all dark terms. I might say I'm not capable enough to make the situation work. Someone on the opposite spectrum may actually overrate their worth. In both cases we're not seeing the situation as it is. The key to moving past black and white thinking is to begin to question our assessment and start challenging ourselves with the question "what are all my options". It can be hard to do this when we are either too depressed or too happy but pushing through to ask about options is good practice to getting the brain to prune black and white thinking strategies and improve accurate observations of what's happening around you. So lets see.
I am depressed. This statement doesn't allow me to go anywhere with the depression. I have made depression a hard, immutable fact. But if I...
...add I am depressed because I am angry at Doris. We have somewhere to go. I've just given a more specific answer about my depression. Now I can challenge the black and white thinking I have about the situation with Doris.
I am angry at Doris for giving me a dirty look the other day when I went into the cafeteria. Ah-hah--we no have the full exploration of the situation. Now Doris has do do one more thing to illustrate black and white thinking.
It was clear she hates me. Bingo! There it is the black thinking that excludes all other options for Doris's look.
Here is where we now apply healthy cognitive patterns to reshape our ready-to-jump into a negative plane of existence ways of thinking.
So how we do it: write out all the possibilities that led to Doris making a face. Could she have eaten something bitter, could she be having a bad day, could she have just had a fight? And so on. By the time you are done making a list of other explanations for behavior you saw, your brain will slip out of black and white thinking and more into realistic thinking. It's far more likely that Doris was processing internal stimuli over starting at you. We are by nature self-centered meaning we are the only ones thinking so much about our selves.
Your homework: think of a situation where you have used black and white thinking and go through the process of finding other explanations to the stimuli you are upset about.
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